This Week in Dumb-Stupid - June 8, 2018

Damn but this was an especially exhausting week.

Dumb-Stupid the First

First up, The Pr*sident of the United States thinks that Canada burned down the White House during the War of 1812!

When Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau asked Trump why he would consider Canada a "national security threat" (Trump's excuse for the escalating trade war with OUR ALLIES), Trump "quipped":

"Didn't you guys burn down the White House?"  Link

In fact, they did not. Canada wasn't even its own country until 1931.

For the record, the British burned down the White House. Since we were at war with Great Britain during the War of 1812, that makes perfect sense.

Dumb-Stupid the Second

Next up, you may be aware that next week, Trump will be meeting with Kim Jong Un of North Korea for a circle-jerk photo op summit. South and North Korea have a long and bitter history and one would think that it will take a thorough knowledge of that history, as well as knowing the goals and strategies of the various stakeholders in the region like China, Japan, and Russia, to be successful.

Or you could, you know, just wing it.

“I think I'm very well prepared, I don't think I have to prepare very much. It's about attitude. It's about willingness to get things done.”  Link

This, ladies and gentleman, is the man that a minority of Americans chose to represent us on the world stage. A guy so lazy and intellectually deficient that he won't even do his homework for a summit with a rogue nuclear power who threatens millions of lives in South Korea, most of Asia and even Hawaii. 

Dumb-Stupid the Third

You may recall how we had a particularly nasty hurricane season in 2017 (thanks, climate change!) where hurricanes devastated Texas, Florida and Puerto Rico. Due to the incompetence and criminal negligence of the Administration, Puerto Rico is, in fact, still reeling with around 5,000 deaths, hundreds of thousands still without power, and another hurricane season fast approaching.

But not to worry! Trump went to FEMA to discuss hurricane preparedness and brought along his entire cabinet! Problem solved! They won't drop the ball this year!

President Trump had a lot else on his mind, turning the closed-door discussion into soliloquies on his prowess in negotiating airplane deals, his popularity, the effectiveness of his political endorsements, the Republican Party’s fortunes, the vagaries of Defense Department purchasing guidelines, his dislike of magnetized launch equipment on aircraft carriers, his unending love of coal and his breezy optimism about his planned Singapore summit with North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. Link

To be fair, who DOESN'T love coal? He apparently hijacked the meeting so badly that there was no actual discussion of FEMA readiness.

Here he is talking about magnetized launch equipment on aircraft carriers, because it's super relevant to hurricane prep.

"Part of it is, they want to have all new. Instead of having the system that throws the aircraft off the [ship], which was always steam. They now have magnets. They’re using magnets instead of steam. . . . They spent hundreds of millions of dollars, I’m hearing not great things about it. It’s frankly ridiculous.”  Link

I cannot wait for him to solve this one. These magnetic launchers have really been keeping me up at night. Ridiculous is an understatement, am I right? WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?!?

I feel so much better, just knowing he's in charge of our safety. Indeed, our very lives rest in his tiny, tiny hands.

Dumb-Stupid the Last

When Trump first took over the White House, he called it a "dump". Now we may know why.

Mika Brzezinski, who has herself been a target of Donald Trump’s misogynistic attacks, revealed one more hypocritical tidbit about the serial philandering, sexual assaulter-in-chief: his #1 complaint about living in the White House is he cannot access porn.  Link

This is the man supported by Christian evangelicals. This is the man supported by the "Family Values" party. This is the man that the red states have turned into their very own Orange Jesus.

I would imagine he can't access porn because the White House has a secure, government wifi network and there are government and security regs about what can be accessed. So no porn for Trump. I certainly don't care whether or not he accesses porn, but the hypocrisy of his supporters is noted, again and again.

No wonder he spends so much time at Mar a Lago.


And that's this week in Dumb-Stupid. Please shoot me.