Thursday, April 11, 2019

He would only be responsible for all U.S. fiscal policy


Because we live in the darkest (and most stupid) timeline, Trump has nominated former pizza magnate, former GOP Presidential candidate, and 9-9-9'er, Herman Cain for a seat on the Federal Reserve Board. Yeah, this is happening.


To minimize his chances of actually being approved by the Senate, Cain has decided to re-bring TEH STUPID.
“When God is ready for us not to have fossil fuels, he’ll find a way,” the former Godfather Pizza CEO told the audience at the Vickers Lecture Series at School of Business.  Link
Now, I don't believe in God, but I think that if I did, I might find the Earth turning into a scorched ball of dust except for the part flooding under dying oceans, threatening all life, might indicate that God is ready for us not to have fossil fuels. I think the invention of a variety of ever cheaper, carbon-neutral energy sources (wind, solar, geothermal) might also be considered a sign from God. But then, I'm just a stupid atheist.

Cain also likened himself to Dr. Martin Luther King, as one does, and said:
“You reach a point in your successful career where making more money isn’t inspiring enough.”
Yep.
"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by their reaching a point where making more money isn't inspiring enough.”
He's EXACTLY like MLK!

It's uncanny.

No comments: