Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Victory!

From an AP story.

One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual."

"He is completely heterosexual," Ralph said. "That is something he discovered. It was the acting-out situations where things took place. It wasn't a constant thing."

Whew! What a relief! Of course, I'm fairly certain that three weeks of "intensive counseling" could also have convinced him that he's a stalk of broccoli.

Now that he's sure he's completely heterosexual, I'm certain that Haggard won't have any more sex with a male prostitute. Because that would be totally gay.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

These people are so goddam stupid it's a wonder they can put their clothes on straight (pun intended!) in the morning.

And speaking of stupid, did you see Sen. Imhofe on Stewart? Talking about global warming, somehow he made the brilliant comment that if the Weather Channel didn't scare people, no one would watch. I guess that means we don't have to worry about global warming.

Do you realize that if Congresspersons had to pass a simple competency test such as a barber has to, many would flunk?

Ipecac said...

Yes, I saw that. Simply stunning that the Weather Channel is behind the Global Warming Conspiracy. Never saw that one coming.

Anonymous said...

Watched "Jesus Camp" last night, which featured a mugging Haggard trying to look cool on camera. This movie is scariest in that it's in no way surprising.

Ipecac said...

Yeah, I'm afraid to watch it. Too depressing and scary.