Monday, March 05, 2007

Worst. Comic. Ever.

For sheer head-scratching weirdness, though, nothing at the Jacob K. Javits Convention Center last weekend could match the exhibit booth for a company called Virgin Comics. The place was low on gaudy outfits, but it was selling a new line of comic books with one of the genre's strangest credit lines ever.

"Chief visionary: Deepak Chopra."
Washington Post Article

Yes, I can see it now. Quite the stable of new superheroes:

Astral Projection Man - Through his mighty powers of astral projection, he can leave his body, roaming the city at will. When crime strikes, he can watch it, incorporeally, unable to interact with the physical world. Later, he can call the police and tell them what happened.

Mister Alt-Medicine - Using the Power of Placebo, he battles his arch-nemesis, Doctor Actual Medicine, at every opportunity. When Doctor Medicine tries to poison children with autism-causing vaccines, Mister Alt-Medicine provides homeopathic pills as a safe alternative. And if they don't work, then the kids just didn't want to not get rubella, okay?

The Channeler - Where evil is afoot, the Channeler is there! The Channeler keeps villains at bay by channeling a roll call of ancient Mesopotamian spirits who give great advice for keeping the holidays from becoming too stressful as well as how to keep your lover interested. No villain can withstand the mighty advice of The Channeler!

Yes, things are definitely looking up in comic stores everywhere. It's about time someone supplanted those lame heroes with such mundane powers as flying, super-strength, and controlling sea creatures. Go go Deepak!

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