Tuesday, November 26, 2019

In which I explain how linear time works


We're coming up on the centennial anniversary of women's right to vote in America! That's great! Congress recently passed the Women’s Suffrage Centennial Commemorative Coin Act, which calls for minted coins celebrating the 100th anniversary.

Yesterday, Trump signed the act among some actual women and asked a really great question! I will, in an attempt to be helpful, answer that question.

Here's what he said:
“They’ve been working on this for years and years. I’m curious why wasn’t it done a long time ago? And also, I guess the answer to that is because now I’m president, we get things done. We get a lot of things done that nobody else got done.”
Did you see the question?  Trump asked why the celebration of the 100th anniversary of women's suffrage wasn't done a long time ago. That's a real big boy question!

I'm old enough to remember when Jimmy Carter tried and tried and yet failed to celebrate the 100th anniversary while he was President. What a loser! And did President Obama celebrate the 100th anniversary while he was President? No, he also just couldn't get it done. What a chump.

(Psst! The answer, is, of course, because it's only now 100 years since women were given the right to vote!)

It's clear that Trump is the only President who could've gotten this done, and boy did he! As is well known, commemorative legislation is incredibly difficult to get through Congress. I know because I was discussing it with a friend on National Sweater Day last year.

So Happy Suffrage, Women of America! Go out and use this right and vote this clownish asshat out of the Oval Office next year.

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