Romney are Santorum are dicks! (They said it, not me)

Oh happy day! Presidential candidates Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum have chosen their secret service code names. Romney’s is “Javelin” as in a long, phallic object, while Santorum’s is surprisingly not “frothy” but “Petrus”, latin for Peter. Peter is of course slang for the male sex organ. (Peter is also Jesus’ second-in-command, which suggests where Santorum’s actual ambitions lie.)

The fact that both candidates feel the need to bolster their manhood by picking manly, phallic nicknames, says a lot about their self-images and confidence.

My secret service nickname would of course be Ipecac. Or maybe Rock Tungsten! Or Lance Steelman! Hmm. I’ll have to give this further thought.