War on Manta-Terror

Holy cow! They said that Steve Irwin's death by stingray attack was just a fluke.

Now there's this: Stingray jumps into boat and stabs man in chest.

With America's troops spread thin in Iraq and Afghanistan, the stingrays have mobilized and started their deadly, barb-filled, campaign against us. It was a bold, but inevitable, move on their part. Their jealousy of our legs and the fact that we aren't as flat as pancakes has enraged them for centuries.

I am sure the President will call for immediate sanctions. So remember, if you buy Sting's new album or see a game with the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, the terrorists win.